5 ridiculous things you probably believe about drunks

1) We all slur and speak too loud.

That's only true when we get hammered. Our tolerance is
higher, and we get sleepy like everyone else.


2) We're a menance on the highways.

That's only true when we get hammered. I drive better at
.08 than most people drive in the morning (which is rather
convenient, as that's when I start drinking),


3) We die young.

Not true. We live longer than sober people.


4) We have red noses.

My nose isn't red. If this is true in general, then most
drunks use makeup.


5) We are easily angered.

There's all types of drunks. Some get overly friendly, or
morose, or like many of us, downright happy. An angry drunk
is someone who should not drink that much.

--Tedward

The Undead Edward M. Kennedy wrote:

1) We all slur and speak too loud.

That's only true when we get hammered. Our tolerance is
higher, and we get sleepy like everyone else.


2) We're a menance on the highways.

That's only true when we get hammered. I drive better at
.08 than most people drive in the morning (which is rather
convenient, as that's when I start drinking),


3) We die young.

Not true. We live longer than sober people.


4) We have red noses.

My nose isn't red. If this is true in general, then most
drunks use makeup.


5) We are easily angered.

There's all types of drunks. Some get overly friendly, or
morose, or like many of us, downright happy. An angry drunk
is someone who should not drink that much.

--Tedward

Why all the teetotaler hate?

Carl Lundstedt
UNL

"Carl Lundstedt" <clundst@gmail.yeah.com> wrote

1) We all slur and speak too loud.

That's only true when we get hammered. Our tolerance is
higher, and we get sleepy like everyone else.


2) We're a menance on the highways.

That's only true when we get hammered. I drive better at
.08 than most people drive in the morning (which is rather
convenient, as that's when I start drinking),


3) We die young.

Not true. We live longer than sober people.


4) We have red noses.

My nose isn't red. If this is true in general, then most
drunks use makeup.


5) We are easily angered.

There's all types of drunks. Some get overly friendly, or
morose, or like many of us, downright happy. An angry drunk
is someone who should not drink that much.

Why all the teetotaler hate?

*Burp*

Hate? What hate? Somebody's got to get shit done.

--Tedward