14.04.2010 - 17:10
AURORA BOREALIS FEELING ITS OATS
CAMBRIDGE, Mass (Rueters) --
A team of astrophysicists from five
Ivy League universities has confirmed
that Aurora Borealis was responsible
for your lousy TV reception Sunday
night.
All networks and cable channels
were affected but CNN and Fox News
were worse off because they apparently
blew a fuse.
"I was waiting all gall-darned week
to see Larry King's exclusive interview
with Ed Conrad on CNN but all I got
was some stupid re-broadcast," said
one.
"I've put Aurora Borelis on my shout
list," added another. "The damn sky
thing -- Northern Lights -- is getting smarter
all the time. Next it'll probably cause the
price of tomatoes to skyrocket."
Leaders of the Tea Party naturally
bamed it Obama.
"He just can't seem to do anything
right," said Sarah Failin', who looks
forward to again pardon turkeys on
Thanksgiving .
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An estimated 27.5 million TV viewers in the U.S. undoubtedly were
cheated and, naturally, very disappointed Sunday night when Aurora
Borealis prevented CNN from telecasting Larry King exclusive interview
with Ed Conrad.
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http://www.hickerphoto.com/data/media/30/aurora-borealis_428.jpg
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Instead, CNN had to fill the hour with something, so it re-broadcast
The King's rather boring interview with some female TV talk show
host.
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This was the third attempt by Larry King to interview Ed Conrad live
-- the first two having been adversely affected by satellite problems
or possibly interference by extraterrestrials.
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Meanwhile, many evolutionists and creationists share the opinion that
perhaps God Almighty doesn't want the Ed Conrad interview to reach the
pubic.
FYI, auroras are the result of the emissions of photons in the earth's
upper atmosphere from ionized nitrogen atoms regaining an electron,
then oxygen and nitrogen atoms returning from an excited state (as
Tiger Woods had been with each of his 15 mistresses). The auroras are
ionized or excited by the collision of solar wind particles being
funneled down and accelerated along the Earth's magnetic field lines
with energy lost by the emission of a photon of light or by colliding
with another atom or molecule.
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(Enough of that technical bullshit.)
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